Learning to Swim

Daniel's first swim lesson didn't go so well. Among other things, he was afraid to go too deep (up to his neck, not above his head kind of deep) and he wasn't very cooperative. We had a discussion about the importance of him learning to swim and the reason he's taking lessons is so Coach Quirina can teach him (he kept telling her - "I can't do that because I don't know how").

The next morning we did the pep talk again - all the way to the pool.

He gets in the water, stands up a little dismayed and loudly announces "Nope, still can't swim!"

Daniel

I had been concerned about Daniel getting a woman swim coach because they tend to be too nice - I'd wanted a man because they don't try redirection so much and just tell the kids "come on, you can do it" and then expect it. That works better for my kids...

Fast forward to his first day of swimming and he had a woman... but this woman is more like a man when it comes to coaching! Anyway, I was telling her I wanted her to be "tough" and not take no too easily when Daniel pipes up "yep, nice just doesn't work with me!"

Abby

Abby:  I know how to make chocolate strawberries! First, you get a bowl of strawberries, then you go to a wedding reception and see if they have a chocolate fountain, then you let the chocolate drip all over the strawberries and wa-la -- you have chocolate strawberries! Just be careful not to get it all over your nice dress your mom bought you for the wedding...

Jacob

One of the things Jacob had to do to earn his religious knot in Cub Scouts is write a letter to someone important to him. This letter could be to thank them for something or to let them know how important they are to him. He decided to write me a note. I was home sick with pneumonia and I had no idea about it.

When I got in the car the next day I found a paper airplane on the seat. It had my name on it so I figured it might be important. This is what it said:

Dear Mom,
Thanks for all the food.
Love,
Jacob


If that wasn't funny enough...

The next day, I couldn't find my note so while Abby was cleaning up I asked her to look for it so I could save it. I told her what it said and started walking away when I overheard Jacob say to her (sort of under his breath) "I don't even really like all the food..."

The Pledge of Allegiance - Daniel Style

I plan a leapin' to the flag
on the nighttime steaks of 'Merica,
and to the public where witches stand
One Nathan, who has gone invisible
with Isabelle and Jeffrey and all.

Good vs. Evil

Me: no, you can't do (insert whatever wrong thing they wanted to do but can't)

Daniel: Mom, you's a bad guy.

Me: Oookay?

Daniel: Well, you tan't (can't) be a bad guy betuz you don't have wed (red) eyes. You's weelly (really) is a good guy but you's pwetending to be a bad guy.

Scent of a...

I got a package yesterday from "the box man" (UPS is the box man, FedEx is the white box man). I wasn't home so the kids asked Fred about it.

Kids: What's inside, mints?!?

Fred: I don't know, why don't you shake it.

Kids: (shaking) It sounds like mints!

Abby: Well, let's smell it to see.

Daniel: (sniffing) I can't tell, it just smells like box...

Also:

The other day I mentioned to Daniel that he probably needed a bath. He sniffs his arm and says "no, I'm not stinty (stinky), I just smell like stin (skin)!